it's a dog's other life.

my name spartacus.  i always forget to tell you about my other life.  all i ever do in this other life is chase stuff and then weird stuff happens to me.  i don't know how i get there and i don't know how i get back, but i know i always switch lives after a good sleep.

sometimes my other life is fun and sometimes it's scary; just like my main life, but i don't spend as much time there and my fambly isn't always there either and sometimes it's crazy there. let me give you an example of my other life.

i'll go to sleep and then i'll wake up in my back yard and there will be a squirrel right in front of me holding my rawhide bone and drinking from the waterbowl chair which my daddy musta put out in the yard for some how.

so i get mad at him for being a squirrel and chase him and bark and stuff and then all of a sudden i notice the yard is gone and we're running down the street and when i catch him it turns out he was just a chew toy and all of a sudden my mommy's van drives past me. so i chase it and bark and stuff.

she stops and opens the door and somehow i'm sitting in the dogtor's office.  then the dogtor turns around and she's a squirrel! she's holding a giant needle and comes at me. i turn to run and see my cat there laughing at me. so i run back home, but i can't see nothing on accounta it's dark all of a sudden. so i stop to look around and when i do, i hear a car pull up behind me and then i hear a car door open and close...

then my eyes open which is weird cause i thought they were already open. i guess i fell asleep again without noticing (that happens to me a lot) cause when i wake up i'm back in the other life and my daddy's opening the front door and i'm so excited to be back i go more crazy than usual.

that other life is crazy and fun and all, but it's exhausting.  i like this side where i can eat and blog and chill out.

Happy Snooze Year!

my name spartacus.  remember when i promised to blog more after the hot summer was over?  remember that?  well i didn't.

since i talked to you last, my fambly grew another tree in the living room.  but i still can't pee on it.  that fat man with the beard broke into our house again. and snow grew.  my sisters get real excited about all this, but i don't get it.  there just ends up being more junk around the house that i'm not allowed to chew on.

today they went around saying, "Happy New Year!" to each other.  i have a theory on this.  they go around saying, "Happy New Year!" cause it's a new year.  they get all excited about this too and i'm just like, "Boooooooorrrrrring!"  

do you know what a new year's resolution is?  well, resolution means: to break a promise. so new year's resolution is like this annual promise breaking ritual for peepoles.

my new year's resolution is to stop licking myself so much.  ")"